JFK: God its hot out here in dallas, better take the convertible

RobertELee: Where the f*ck is @Jeb w/ my cavalry

HonestAbe: @HBStowe...thanks. B*!@#. No seriously. #War #thingsineedlikeaholeinthehead

Magellan: I think i made a wrong turn at tierra del fuego #needGarmin

EWhitney: My invention is complete...but what to call it? #drink2much

MalcolmX: Seriously guys, I'm bringing it back! #BowtiesRCool

EdgarAllenPoe: NOTHING GOOD CAN COME OF THAT STUPID BIRD! #TappingMustStop

FridaKahlo: @Diego and I got hit by a trolley and I missed my waxing appointment!!1! #IHateItWhen

Caligula: Hey followers, I'm changing my handle to @Jupiter. Also, party at my house this weekend. #LadiesOnly

BenMussolini: @France. Sorry, guys, but @AdolphH's trains actually run on time. #Booya

PisaForeman: Five degrees? Nobody can build a perfectly square angle. Who's gonna notice a five degree lean? #ItsFiveOclockSomewhere

AnneFrank: Whew. Narrow escape. Might be in prison, but managed to hide diary from @OttoFrank.

BenFranklin: Srsly, guys? I INVENTED ELECTRICITY and you still can't make me president? #ImMovingToCanada

HonestAbe: With me as your president, I know this country will secede! ...Mary, where's the delete button? I meant SUCCEED! #HomophonesArePeopleToo